Talking to Our Children About Sex

Mother walking with her kids on the beach

Contributor: Jane McGuire, BS, Executive Assistant for Eating Disorder Hope and Addiction Hope

Most people when asked can remember how they first heard about sex. Many were taught about it during middle school, in health class.

Each individual’s introduction to this topic is an important part of how our worldview on sex is formed.

Sexual addiction and pornography is prevalent in our society, because of this it is important to take the time to talk with our children about the real meaning and value of sex.

Talk to Your Children

My husband and I have always felt it was important that this conversation first come from us, as parents.

Much of the information that is discussed between kids can be incorrect and derogatory.

It’s not an easy conversation for us to start. Usually the parent who draws the short straw has to speak first, but not really.

In our family, the mom was in charge of talking to the girls and the dad was in charge of talking with the boys.

This allowed the true expert to lead the discussion. We always made sure that the kids knew whatever questions they had could be asked privately and the truth would always be told. It’s one of our family rules to this day.

Influence of Technology

Things have changed since we were kids. Access to the internet has changed the dynamics of sexual education and relationships.

Smart watch

It’s important that all of these topics be brought into the discussion (as age appropriate) with our children.

Applying safety protocols to your internet settings and blocking stations on our televisions is still an important part of protecting the innocence of our kids.

But we must take it a step further and have the difficult discussions.

We need to take the time to teach our children about the importance of abstinence and love, as well as our beliefs and values regarding this subject.

As our children age we need to be realistic about the pressures they face, and be available to talk and walk through their teen years by their side. Keeping the communication lines open through these stages and remaining approachable is imperative!

Communication Between Kids

Social media and texting has also had an impact on our children. Kids are texting and saying things via their social media accounts that they would not say to each other face to face.

Back view of a group of high school students walking down the hallway and talkingIt has opened up a new challenge for those of us parenting kids through this social media driven age. We must teach our children about the value of words, and the importance of true relationship and kindness.

Remember that the best example of this is being shown through you as their parent.

Sharing with our children that sex is gift and that it was created for us by a loving God is important. It is to be valued and treasured.

If we do not take the time to teach our children the value of relationship and the importance of intimacy in sex, they may learn another version of sex and intimacy elsewhere.

Wouldn’t you rather this instruction come from you?


Jane McGuireAbout the author: Jane McGuire is the Director of Content at Eating Disorder Hope & Addiction Hope. Jane graduated from Eastern Oregon University with a Bachelor’s degree in Business. Jane believes that everyone has a story of trial, that when shared, can be used to benefit and encourage someone else who is struggling to find hope and direction.

The opinions and views of our guest contributors are shared to provide a broad perspective of addictions. These are not necessarily the views of Addiction Hope, but an effort to offer discussion of various issues by different concerned individuals.

We at Addiction Hope understand that addictions result from a combination of environmental and genetic factors. If you or a loved one are suffering from an addiction, please know that there is hope for you, and seek immediate professional help.

Reviewed By: Jacquelyn Ekern, MS, LPC on January 29, 2016
Published on

About Baxter Ekern

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